For example, the “Instant Cake Mix” at the local
supermarket, displays a flawless vanilla sponge cake, drizzled with a layer of syrup-drenched
Maraschino cherries. And what’s even
more convincing, are the contented faces of the children, observing their
mother as she attempts to take a slice of her ‘mammoth’ creation.
Needless to say, the final product of your cake mix
looks nothing like the advertised image; you end up spending the rest of your
afternoon cleaning the worthless mess in your kitchen – cursing dreadfully.
As an experienced advertiser and ‘marketeer’, I
found myself on the receiving end of the stick this morning, and admittedly was
not impressed. My wife purchased a box
of underwear for me – the “XXL” size could not have been more visible on the
packaging, as was the picture of a robust male, flexing his muscles.
After an excruciating three minutes, and
incalculable attempts to stretch the pair of underwear from one end of the room
to the other, I slipped into my new briefs, looking nothing like the image on
the box.
Standing in front of my full length mirror, I
stared at my whopping reflection – feeling angry and threatened at the same
time.
My wife tried to console me by complimenting my
weight loss, but all I could think of was David Beckham, and his newly launched
advertising campaign for H & M.
Beckham complimented his new line of underwear by
saying, “it’s a true reflection of what every man wants to wear.”
“Well David, let me know if this is a true
reflection of the image conjured up in your mind, when you were designing your
line of clothing?”
I have invested in a plethora of dieting books over
the years. One of these books (written
by an American-Greek nutritionist), deals with the psychological aspects of
dieting. “It’s important to take all
your negative emotions, and transform them into positive and motivational
feelings.”
Easier said than done, when all I wanted to do was
contact the manufacturing clothing company, and sue them for every damn penny!
It’s not their fault that I am ‘slightly’
overweight, but I would appreciate a more realistic approach when advertising
an “XXL” size of briefs.
Don’t use an undersized, malnourished model to
represent my group of people – thoughtless
bastards!
I’m on an advertising protest. I am seriously reconsidering my approach to
conveying the message, and I encourage you all to do the same. It’s time we all took a stand against the false advertising which exists out
there…
My first target is McDonalds. The double
cheeseburger advertised on every damn billboard in Cyprus
Weight for me tomorrow. Paul
Paul Lambis is the author of “Where is Home?” – A
journey of hilarious contrasts.
For more
information on Paul Lambis, and to order his book online, visit www.paul-lambis.com
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