Thursday 22 May 2014

DAYS 461-477: Prayers for Bobby, Prayers for Cyprus

I'm fairly conservative in my theological views. I believe that the Bible is morally authoritative, that sex is for marriage, and that promiscuity is harmful to everyone involved. But, for many years of my life, I also believed that all homosexual behaviour was wrong — whether it consisted of anonymous hookups or committed relationships. I believed, based on what I was taught that even the most loving and monogamous of same-sex relationships was evil in God's eyes.  In recent years, my view on that subject changed. I now believe that homosexual behaviour is appropriate within the confines of a committed, loving, monogamous, lifelong relationship.

As Cyprus’ first-ever gay pride parade draws near the Church began its onslaught, calling homosexuality, “an affliction and a moral downfall.” The Holy Synod, headed by Archbishop Chrysostomos, said events like gay pride parades were “saddening and worrying.”
The Church claims that science says that homosexuality is an affliction. “Therefore it should be properly treated. The church is opposed to all attempts for homosexuality to be socially accepted and protected by law.”
The Synod said homosexuality has led to a global lax in morality, which in turn has led to “tragic results such as an increase in divorce, paedophilia, people dying of AIDS, families torn apart, the unnatural adoption of children and many more. These are the strongest arguments against this unnatural way of life,” it said.

Much to my disappointment, I’ve been embroiled in debates about homosexuality many times, and every time, someone defending homosexual behaviour brings up divorce.  “If marriage is so important to you,” the retort will go, “why don’t you ever talk about the sin of divorce?”  The implication being: “You are just picking on homosexuals.  You don’t follow the literal letter of the law any more than we do.  If you did, you would be focusing on divorce, because that’s the bigger issue in our churches.”

Consensus now exists that paedophilia is a distinct sexual orientation, not something that develops in someone who is homosexual or heterosexual. Some people with paedophilic urges are also attracted to adults, and may act only on the latter urges. Because people with paedophilic urges tend to be attracted to children of a particular gender, they are sometimes described in the literature as heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual paedophiles. Homosexual adults are no more likely than heterosexuals to abuse children.

HIV is a gay disease – a myth that refuses to die. Misinformation, fear, ignorance and media sensationalism continue to fuel this myth in Cyprus. For every one person like me trying to tell the truth about HIV transmission, there seems to be a dozen shrieking, simpleminded people with a staggering inability to grasp reality.
HIV is not a gay disease. All of us are at risk in getting HIV from unsafe sex or other modes of blood to blood contact, like sharing needles. Television talk shows and all those fundamentalist/conservative/family values groups are chock full of flaky, clueless lightweights who made up their minds twenty years ago that HIV is a product of the so-called "gay lifestyle" and it's God's wrath on homosexuals. These poor creatures are so invested in this myth that they are incapable of hearing the truth. They continue to spew their self-righteous, delusional feculence to the detriment of all humanity. They are, in fact, shameless, insidious prevaricators driven solely by their irrational loathing and fear of homosexuality.

God does not ask us to choose between compassion and faith in the Bible. Christians are increasingly divided over the issue of the acceptance and inclusion of gay persons into the church. The debate itself is usually framed as essentially pitting the Bible, on one hand, against compassion and social justice on the other. Our Christian hearts compel us to grant full moral and legal equality to gay and lesbian people.
Compassion for others is the fundamental cornerstone of Christian ethics; the Bible is the bedrock of the Christian faith. What Christian can possibly choose between the two?
The answer is that no Christian is called upon to make that choice. The text of the Bible on one hand, and full equality for gay and lesbian people on the other, is a false dichotomy. God would not ask or expect Christians to ever choose between their compassion and their faith.
Reconciling the Bible with unqualified acceptance and equality for LGBT people does not necessitate discounting, recasting, or deconstructing the Bible. All it takes is reading those passages of the Bible wherein homosexuality is mentioned with the same care that we would any other passage of the book.
We can trust God; we can trust that God loves. And we can trust that we can take God, in this matter, as in all things, at his word. If there is no clearly stated directive in the Bible to sideline and banish gay people, then it is morally indefensible for Christians to continue to do so. What cannot be denied is that Christians have caused a great deal of pain and suffering to gay persons by:
·         Banning their participation in the church, thus depriving them of the comforts and spiritual fruits of the church.
·         Banning their participation in the sacrament of marriage, thus depriving them of the comforts and spiritual fruits of marriage.
·         Damaging the bonds between gays and their straight family members, thus weakening the comforts and spiritual fruits of family life for both gays and their families.
·         Using their position within society as spokespersons for God to proclaim that all homosexual relations are disdained by God, thus knowingly contributing to the cruel persecution of a minority population.

Christians do not deny that they have done these things. However, they contend that they have no choice but to do these things, based on what they say is a clear directive about homosexuals delivered to them by God through the Holy Bible. They assert that the Bible defines all homosexual acts as sinful, instructs them to exclude from full participation in the church all non-repentant sinners (including gay people), and morally calls upon them to publicly (or at least resolutely) denounce homosexual acts.
Without an explicit directive from God to exclude and condemn homosexuals, the Christian community’s treatment of gay persons is in clear violation of what Jesus and the New Testament writers pointedly identified as one-half of God’s most important commandment: to love one’s neighbour as one’s self.

A recent spiritual journey on YouTube led me to a movie titled “Prayers for Bobby”. Based on the life of Bobby Griffith, this all-American boy grew up as an innocent, happy and intelligent child with an obedient and gentle spirit. But as he grew into adolescence, he discovered that he was attracted to other teenage boys his age or older and not girls. And because Bobby was raised as a devout Christian and was taught that being gay was one of the worst sins imaginable, he believed that he was defective, that he was going to burn in Hell for eternity, and that he was unworthy of God’s love.
Bobby was very aware of his church’s teachings because he was very active in the Walnut Creek Presbyterian Church in Walnut Creek, California along with his brother, two sisters and mother, Mary, who taught Sunday school. Unable to handle the irresolvable daily struggles and conflict with both his family and his religion, Bobby jumped off a bridge onto a busy highway in front of a large tractor trailer in Portland, Oregon and was killed instantly due to massive internal injuries.
His detailed personal diaries are filled with diatribes of self-hate because he believed that as a homosexual, he was a worthless human being and innately evil – a tool of the Devil. He believed these things because that was what his church taught. He thought that he had no reason to live because he wasn’t allowed to love who he was attracted to and was damned no matter what he did.
The grieving Mary Griffith was convinced that she was very much to blame for her son’s incomprehensible death. Because of her constant and incessant preaching to him of the evilness of homosexuality, by continually quoting a stream of bible verses at him in a campaign to convince him to “change” from being gay to straight, which she later learned was not possible, and by being openly ashamed of him, she believed that in her ignorance she had unknowingly helped push him over the edge. She came to believe that she had sacrificed her child in the name of rigid, uncaring religious tradition when all she should have done was tell him that he was perfectly all right just as he was. After his death her beloved church turned its back on the surviving family and was unable to help them explain what went wrong or offer much comfort. She then reexamined her theology and beliefs about homosexuality and was herself radically transformed when she educated herself about the truth of what it means to be gay or lesbian.

Mary Griffith's reexamination of her theology consisted of two very important things that she did after she read her son’s revealing diaries. The first was to find out from the minister of the local Concord Metropolitan Community Church, Larry Whitsell, that there was an alternative and much more compassionate, logical and accurate view of the teachings in the Bible which accepted her gay son just the way he was, that he was neither defective nor dammed and that God would never have wanted him to try to change himself into a heterosexual. The second was to get to know the members of the local P-FLAG* organisation, and to sit in on their meetings and listen to the heart wrenching stories of these families who have a loved one who is gay or lesbian. Since then she has been a national crusader for gay and lesbian youth, doing her best to right the terrible wrongs that society and the organised church have inflicted on this stigmatised and denigrated minority.

Back on the home front, the Head of European Commission Representation in Cyprus Giorgos Markopouliotis said, “LGBT people were victims of discrimination on a daily basis which forces them to hide their identity as a survival strategy. An EU study conducted in 2012 amongst the LGBT community showed that half of them were victims of discrimination or were harassed due to their sexual orientation.”
Markopouliotis said that in Cyprus thirty-nine per cent of gay peoples shy away from publicly expressing their sexual identity, fearing that they will be targeted. Seventy-six per cent claim that they don’t hold hands with their partner in public while fifty-six per cent said they had been victims of discrimination.

The gay community has cried out for justice in Cyprus for many years.  The suffering imposed on gay persons is severe and unchristian like; the directive from God to marginalise and ostracise gay people would have to be clear and explicit in the Bible. If there is no such clearly stated directive, then the continued mistreatment of gay and lesbian people is morally indefensible, and must cease.

The recent support shown by remarkable icons such as Whoopi Goldberg, Olympia Dukakis and Harry Mavromichalis is an inspiring prayer to all Cypriots to embrace and welcome the first Gay pride festival in Cyprus, and a sign that Cyprus is finally making strides in leaving behind prejudices.


*P-FLAG is a national organisation and support group of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays

Monday 5 May 2014

DAYS 399 – 460: Cyprus, elections, and a bowl of goldfish

As a citizen of a ‘democratic’ country, I am compelled to exercise my right to the freedom of speech.  Expressing one’s thoughts and opinions about the current state of affairs has become a favourite past time, particularly in Cyprus.  The masses have invaded the corner coffee boutiques; these havens of backgammon and long winded frappe-drinking sessions, have rapidly transformed into parliaments of political rallies: troops of disgruntled people voicing their concerns over an ailing economy, a banking system that can only be deemed “effective” – if one is playing by their own rules, and a government that resembles a barnyard fiesta. 

Admittedly, one would not want to assume any administrative role during these problematic times, but one has to acknowledge the kindergarten antics of the faunae trying to manage the island.  And what’s more alarming, is the state of decay on the streets which are constantly overlooked by the disciples – the mayors, who believe that a few hanging plants, dotted around the old market, will disguise the string of bankrupt shops, lining the cash-stricken streets of the town.  I’m appalled at the notion of Pafos presenting itself as the “Cultural Capital of Europe in 2017” without any functional theatre in sight.  And even more alarming, is the confidence of these individuals, marketing themselves to the coffee-induced masses for a vote in the upcoming European parliament elections. 
Undeniably, there are a few worthy candidates floating around; fingers crossed for the honest, pro-active individuals to represent our injured nation abroad.

The local channels are airing their daily low-budget soapies; scenarios that could easily convince one to grab the nearest object in sight and cause self-induced bodily harm.  I reach for the electricity account, resting unopened on the coffee table; the amount due could easily impose heart failure.  I continue to work my way through the pile of envelopes, lost in a sea of supermarket specials, listening simultaneously to the news; the “Cyprus Problem” is on the agenda. 
“The focus of resolving our island’s four-decade division is of vital importance,” says the barnyard autocrat, pounding his fist on the podium as his glasses steam up.  A roaring applause ensues – members of his own political party, idolising their rooster.  A plethora of empty promises are made as the camera captures an ironic grin confirming a solution to the island’s division, no matter what the cost.  A thought bubble suggests that, “I will be the one who goes down in history as the man who resolved the Cyprus issue.”

More news.  The tourism board has reported that Cyprus is on the mend, thanks to the influx of tourists heading to our sun-soaked shores this summer.  A slight hint of optimism, as we begin polishing our social skills, fine-tuning our renowned joie de vivre, and practice our glass-balancing-on-our-head talent to impress the tourists.  In true Cypriot style, we unfurl the red carpet at both airports, raise the prices on our menus and souvenir items, and wait for our European brothers and sisters to help management  put our country back on track.

Weight for me soon. Paul

Paul Lambis has recently written, produced and co-directed a riveting war drama “74”, based on the 1974 Turkish invasion of Cyprus. He is also the author of “Where is Home?” – A journey of hilarious contrasts.  For more information on Paul Lambis, and to order his book online, visit www.paul-lambis.com

Wednesday 5 March 2014

DAYS 348 – 398: Temporary Insanity

It’s official.  Thirty-three days have trampled my one year goal-weight mark, and the word ‘diet’ has been archived together with those other gloomy terms which represent ‘health’ and ‘fitness’.  I had ignored all the principles of healthy eating, and consumed at least one hundred McDonalds chicken burgers en route to the last month of rehearsals.  But, despite the risk of heart disease and future diabetes, and the fact that I had contributed entirely to the local McDonalds’ monthly rental agreement, I refuse to take the blame for my recent waywardness; it all boils down to an unfortunate case of Temporary Insanity.

The pressures of staging a theatrical production in Cyprus, on the scale of “74”, were immense.  Although the cast and crew of my latest theatrical play proved, on many occasion, to be the greatest ensemble one could ever hope for, the task of raising the funds was arduous.  The past week has seen my production team working feverishly behind the scenes, eager to balance the books, and open a new chapter for “Melina” – my next exciting play scheduled for the summer.

Amidst the ‘crisis’, I am reminded by my spouse that the period of Lent is one of spiritual reconciliation, and an opportunity to resume a healthy way of life.  My Orthodox beliefs dictate that all meat, eggs and dairy products be eliminated from my daily intake, and that one is required to leave all sinful attitudes behind.  I responded enthusiastically to this ritual by stocking up the refrigerator with an abundance of vegetables and fish.  The cupboards in the kitchen were replenished with organic products and healthy, low-calorie preserves, endless supplies of bottled spring water and enough rice cakes to satisfy the entire overweight population of Cyprus. 

Heading off to work, I am reminded yet again that the roads in Cyprus resemble the aftermath of a civil war.  After swerving to avoid a ditch in the centre of the road, and a cat attempting to cross the lane at the same time, I observed my tyre stumbling over two nails, resting on the side of the street from the ongoing nearby construction site.  The dust populating the atmosphere – an annual sandstorm ‘treat’ which the people of Cyprus are forced to endure from the neighbouring Sahara desert, made visibility difficult.  As I attempted to change my tyre, a freak rainstorm decided to bless our water-stricken earth, flooding everything in its path; the cat was compelled to surf along the side of the road, gripping tightly onto a broken olive tree branch.
I experienced a brief sense of rage as my mouth recited every irreverent word that came to mind.

Back at the office, the reality of unpaid salaries and demotivation continues to plague the workforce.  An atmosphere of fury develops, and one is made to feel guilty when questioning the whereabouts of ones wages.  The powers that be are unable to commit to any payment date, as I envisage myself storming through the management offices with a machine gun, firing on everyone in sight.  A strong case of Temporary Insanity would justify my motives.
Oscar Pistorius is back on trial in South Africa, as the tax payer continues to bear the brunt of an over-publicised trial.  The mayor of my hometown remains totally oblivious to the fact that there is a countdown clock posted outside his office; there are less than three years until the town inherits the ‘Cultural Capital’ crown, and Pafos hardly boasts any decent theatres suitable for hosting the events.

A tube of sour cream and chives flavoured Pringles have brought a smile to my face; a tub of cottage cheese serves as the perfect accompaniment. A plate of de-pipped olives, shaved slices of salami, diced and salted tomato, asparagus coated with olive oil and crushed black pepper, pickled beetroot and fried Halloumi cheese are humming a chorus of joyful, gospel noise.  This is my perfect recipe for ‘spiritual reconciliation’.  And, if anyone feels indifferent, it’s a simple case of Temporary Insanity.

Weight for me soon. Paul


Paul Lambis has recently written, produced and co-directed a riveting war drama “74”, based on the 1974 Turkish invasion of Cyprus. He is also the author of “Where is Home?” – A journey of hilarious contrasts.  For more information on Paul Lambis, and to order his book online, visit www.paul-lambis.com

Monday 13 January 2014

DAYS 295 – 347: A Message from The Queen

On the surface, it may seem I have suffered from a severe case of writer’s block for more than fifty days; my lengthy absence from the blogging scene has brought on a tidal wave of emails, most of which are questioning my existence on Mother Earth.  I am alive!

I’ve thrown myself into a sea of paperwork.  I’m working feverishly to rid myself of any excess administrative work as I enter the final phase of rehearsals, deadlines, expressive outbursts and rivers of caffeine… The theatrical production of “74” is scheduled to premiere in Cyprus on the 19th February 2014.

I kick-started the new year under the mystical chimes of Big Ben.  New Year’s Eve in London is certainly the most effective way to celebrate the riddance of what was, the most disastrous year in the history of Cyprus.  2014 has armed me against all negativity, despite the fact that my recent battle of the bulge saw me defeated through the bouroughs of London’s gourmet street markets.  My daily routine would start off with a respectable serving of brown toast and low-fat cheese spread. Within two hours, I would find myself queuing up for a waffle or crepe, dunked in a bottle of hazelnut chocolate spread, and then heading off to the pie and pastry stand for another mid-morning fiesta. No comment.

I’m back on a low-calorie diet of shakes and soups.  I’m hoping my appearance on stage will resemble the part of a distraught soldier in my war drama, but I’m feeling more like an ogre these days; hopefully the audience won’t mistake my appearance with Shrek’s.

On a lighter note, I stumbled across a humorous ‘message’ from The Queen, and I thought I would share it with you: (I hope my American friends will forgive me…)

A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which she does not fancy).
Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections.
Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').

2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'

3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.

5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.

9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).

12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen!

PS: Only share this with friends who have a good sense of humour (NOT humor)!

Weight for me soon. Paul

Paul Lambis has written, and will be directing the riveting war drama “74”, based on the 1974 Turkish invasion of Cyprus. He is also the author of “Where is Home?” – A journey of hilarious contrasts.  For more information on Paul Lambis, and to order his book online, visit www.paul-lambis.com