DAY 78: Family Gatherings

As is customary, Sundays are normally reserved for large family luncheons. The table is typically set in a casual tone with a traditional centrepiece of Greek olives, toasted village bread – drizzled with hints of olive oil and oregano, tzatziki – yoghurt and cucumber dip, tahini salad and taramosalata – the renowned, slightly pinkish, fish roe dip.

And, if the menu includes an outdoor barbeque of rosemary-seasoned lamb, mouth-watering pork kebabs on a skewer and generous portions of grilled Cypriot Halloumi cheese, copious amounts of lemons will add the final touch to the traditional Mediterranean setting.

It was my sister and brother-in-law who extended an invitation to the entire clan for an afternoon at their wonderful home in Pafos.  Located in a charming village on the outskirts of the main town, their delightful dwelling was the perfect venue for a “crisis luncheon” – an opportunity for the family to gather around the table to help ‘celebrate’ the economic demise of our little island.

The plentiful menu included my brother-in-law’s lemon-and-herb marinated chicken breasts, oversized beef burgers, spicy Cypriot sausages and delicate slices of lamb, flame-grilled to suit our individual requirements. 

As the various meat dishes gradually took their place on the dining table next to the grilled mushrooms – veiled by a tangy combination of mature cheddar cheese and garlic cloves, the family submitted unreservedly into the food soiree; our enthusiasm mirrored a scene from a wildlife documentary: a pride of predators biting into their captured prey.

Although our antics could be considered blasphemous – after all, “Lent” is a period of abstinence from anything meat or dairy; our selfish needs to satisfy our bellies has yet again prevailed, and my stomach has certainly regretted yesterday’s overindulgence.

My mother’s dreamy meringue cake entered the room as the final, fitting piece to the equation.  The family gathering was complimented with a round of fabulously roasted coffees and a superstitious reading of the Greek coffee cup; an amusing practice passed down to my sister by our late grandmother.

As the sun bid its final farewell, we returned home to our own reality, passing out on the couch, attempting to digest the festivities of my sister and brother-in-law’s “crisis luncheon;” hardly a “crisis” if one considers the quantity of food consumed.

The evening’s entertainment included the return of Britain’s got talent and Spielberg’s latest episode of Smash.  Both shows reminded me of my upcoming performances in London, and the dreadful thought of showcasing my “morbidly obese” body to a new group of onlookers.

This frightful reality encouraged me to ‘enjoy’ a bowl of oats with low-fat milk and half a grapefruit for breakfast.  There’s an apple for lunch and a protein shake to supplement my hunger for the afternoon.  As for the evening, I have requested a healthy portion of grilled fish and vegetables.  If I continue on this path, I should be able to see the results of healthy eating.  I will refrain from using the “dieting” term, and have eliminated the word from my own vocab.

I’ve just been informed that another family gathering has been scheduled for this Sunday. Sadly, I have declined the invitation.

Weight for me tomorrow. Paul

Paul Lambis is the author of “Where is Home?” – A journey of hilarious contrasts. 
For more information on Paul Lambis, and to order his book online,
visit www.paul-lambis.com