Step One
Admit that you have a problem. Acknowledging that you have a habit you'd
like to break is vital. Consider the ways that the habit alters or affects your
life, and accept that you'd like to change this. Ask yourself:
a) Why is this habit bad?
b) What's holding me back from getting rid of it?
c) What things or people stop me from breaking the habit?
Step Two
Change your environment. Research suggests that sometimes our
environments can cue us to perform certain behaviours, even if we're actively
trying to stop. Find a way to change your scenery and see if your bad habit
becomes less tempting.
For instance, if you like to smoke out on your patio, remove the chair
you sit in and replace it with a plant. If you tend to overeat at the same
location at the dining room table, move to a different seat or rearrange your
furniture such that you're facing a different direction than usual when you
eat. Subtle changes to the environment can make a habit less rote and force
your mind to reassess what's happening.
Limit your interactions with people who encourage your bad habit. If
your habit takes place in an environment that you can't alter, like your place
of work, then try changing the social configuration of your habit. For
instance, if you smoke on breaks with a group of coworkers, start timing your
break differently so that you're not tempted to join the fray and light up.
Your social life might suffer, but your health will improve.
Step Three
Create barriers to the habit. If your reason for avoiding the habit is
more pressing than your desire to engage in it, the behaviour will become
continually easier to avoid. Here are a few suggestions:
a) Find someone you like who disapproves of your habit. Tell yourself
you will not indulge in the act whenever you are around that person. Use the
person as an anchor, and try to be around them whenever you feel like
controlling the urge.
b) Capitalise on other habits. Use another behaviour or tendency to
combat the habit. For instance, if you're lazy, be lazy about your habit. Think
of it as too much effort. If you're a smoker, keep your pack locked up in your
car down the street.
c) Pay up. Use the same rationale behind a swear jar: every time you
slip back into the habit, put a euro (or more) in a can or jar. Set an amount
that you'll hate to cough up whenever you give into the urge, and stick to it.
When you've successfully kicked the habit, spend the money on a reward or
donate it to a charitable cause.
Step Four
Find a placeholder. Try to replace your habit with something new and
positive in your life. The key is not to focus on the "not doing,"
but to think instead about "doing." For instance, if you're trying to stop
smoking, eat a sucker or walk around the block when you would usually light up.
Filling the void left by your old habit with another activity will help you
avoid backsliding.
Step Five
Be patient. Behavioural conditioning is a long process, and breaking a
habit takes time - as much as you'd like to, you probably won't stop doing it
overnight. Set realistic goals and plan to have the behaviour wiped out in 21
days. If you get to the end of a month and find you need more time, take
another 21 days. As long as you're still improving, don't pay too much
attention to how long the process is taking. You'll get there eventually.
Tips
a) Believe in
yourself. Telling yourself you can't do something is a bad cognitive habit that
needs breaking!
b) Fight the
sudden urge of your habit. It may be hard at first but you will see fit to it
in the future.
c) Take on one
habit at a time, two at most. Any more than that and you'll feel overwhelmed.
d) Remember to
reward and congratulate yourself when you do well.
e) Make a
realistic plan to avoid your bad habits.
Weight
for me tomorrow. Paul
Paul Lambis is the author of “Where is Home?” – A journey of hilarious contrasts.
For more information on Paul Lambis, and to order his book online,
visit www.paul-lambis.com
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