Wednesday, 8 May 2013

DAY 100: Wake Up Call

I returned to work this morning after a seven-day break; the Easter celebrations coinciding with a public holiday presented the perfect opportunity for an extended holiday week before the summer season finally kicked in. 
The glorious weather (twenty-four degrees Celsius at night and a scorching thirty-five degrees throughout the day) inspired a wardrobe detox; the winter clothes were pushed to the back of the cupboard, making way for the colourful tones of summer.

Amidst the vibrant hues of cotton and polyester, my black swimming costume emerged – folded neatly, overwhelmed by the intense musty scent of the old cupboard.  And in the process of undressing before my wife’s full-length mirror, my waterproof trunks were stretched onto my scandalous body (after an exhausting battle), trying to conceal the overflowing mountains of fat.  The reality of my unrelenting winter binging escapades flaunting before my own eyes were revealing a distasteful start to the summer season.

I placed a large t-shirt over my valley of blubber and dove into the crystal waters of the swimming pool, hoping to conceal my shame under the water.  Admittedly, I enjoyed the afternoon with my son, tossing the ball backwards and forwards repetitively, however, the image of my abominable shape kept flashing at the back of my mind, reminding me of my own torment.

I could hear the sinister cries from The Three Tenors who sang joyously in full soprano; Hansel and Gretel were recalling their sensational experiences of chocolate bars and hard-boiled sweets.  In fact, my mind was abducted by an entire group of self-absorbed individuals chanting familiar, yet evil rhymes of overeating, leaving me bewildered and unimpressed by my own self esteem.

I waited patiently for a group of holidaymakers to leave the pool area before planning my departure.  I swam towards the steps, scanning the grounds for any human presence, grabbing the towel resting on the sunbed.  My unrehearsed manoeuvres forced the pocket from my swimming costume to grip onto the gate, causing the pants to tear loudly on the side.  As I headed on into the house to assess the mutilation, I observed this harsh wake-up call which reminded me that a strict diet was long overdue.

And so, after an evening of self-debate and strict promises of adherence, I embarked on my diet, eager to eliminate those unwanted guests trapped within my body.  The secret to losing weight is enhanced by drinking copious amounts of water.  Armed with a bottle of mineral water, I am equipped to face the summer heat with an ocean of optimism by my side. 

I have one more year before I enter the fourth decade of existence on this planet.  My resolution to start my fortieth year with a new image is one I am determined to keep.

Weight for me tomorrow. Paul

Paul Lambis is the author of “Where is Home?” – A journey of hilarious contrasts. 
For more information on Paul Lambis, and to order his book online,
visit www.paul-lambis.com

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